Teacher Bytes

The other day our Spanish Language liaison e-mailed the parents of one of my Web Media Productions students wanted to have a conference with me. This was not surprising because the young lady, an honor student in other classes, got off to a rocky start. Seems she had a hard time adjusting to the fact that all work was being done online. I thought this would be one of those conferences where I would have to explain and justify everything that is going on in class. Frankly, I am surprised that I have not had more conferences like this given the nature of the course. It also concerned me that we would have to work through a translator given the family was from Mexico. Things get lost in translation.

When the conference started I explained to the parents why their daughter got low grades on her report card. The biggest problem was she missed several assignments. The young lady started the course late and had to play catch-up with an assigned peer tutor. I also explained the work that was missed before she entered the class was not counting against her. Fortunately I had some good news too. After seeing her report card, the young lady realized she was going to have to get to work like any other class. She has never missed an assignment since and is taking the lead on several projects. Definitely a candidate for most improved. Another observation I shared with the parents was the girl was a bit shy and unsure of herself at the beginning. Now she is more outgoing and confident in how she handles herself. She now attempts to work with applications like Voice Thread by herself first before asking for help and readily goes before the camera.
The parents listened and were pleased to hear their daughter was making gains in the class.

Then came the shocker. They told me their daughter has been showing them her work and explaining how she does it. This so pleased and interested the parents they purchased a computer and Flip video camcorder so she may continue using the tools learned in my class with future other classes. They also liked the idea of sharing things such as video with extended family in Mexico. The parents thanked me for teaching new ways to learn with their daughter and I hoped I could teach her more in the future. I never get tired of hearing I have made a difference in someone’s life.

I think I know what my next big project will be. Next year, armed with my trusty Flip Video Camera, I am going to create a new reality show that will have people from all walks of life attempt to enter a middle school classroom and teach. My inspiration for this show came from watching Hell’s Kitchen on the Fox network. This show, like American Idol and The Apprentice, show people from different backgrounds who get to audition for jobs with millions of people watching each week. After the end of each show that has contestants performing some difficult task, some one’s dreams of fame and fortune is crushed when they are voted off.

Hell’s Kitchen is no different. Chef Gordon Ramsay, famous for a bunch of restaurants I have never heard of, gives the contestants a task for cooking a meal for customers (last night was family night). While the contestants are running around cooking and trying not to kill themselves (one woman burned her hand) or give the customers food poisoning (someone served “raw” chicken to a kid), Chef Ramsay is standing around yelling obscenities and throwing food at everybody (Blutarsky would have been proud). Thinking back, the chef who served raw chicken deserved this treatment. The chicken chef should have been voted off for nearly costing the network a huge lawsuit but he lived to cook another day. Of course they have interviews with contestants on what was going on and why they deserve to stay. The winner of the contest will get to work in a restaurant in Los Angeles.

Back to my idea. I would put contestants who met certain requirements, especially being catty on television, into middle schools with similar demographics with the purpose of teaching students over the course of the season. The supervising teacher will be an experienced administrator with a reputation for chewing up new teachers and spitting them out of their school. Each week the “teachers” are given various tasks to prove they belong in the classroom. One week is creating a lesson plan to see who can keep the most students awake at the end of class. Another episode will have contestants teach with technology. High marks will be given to those who don’t call tech person or worse get one of the kids to do it. A sure fire ratings winner will have contestants give quarter grades then try to defend those grades to parents who think their child got a bum rap. Another interesting show would be contestants trying to organize a field trip with high marks given for not leaving a child and the destination staying intact. Of course contestants will have to attend faculty meetings, committee meetings, sub-committee meetings, district mandated training sessions, extracurricular activities, and getting a second job waiting tables evenings and weekends to make ends meet. At the end of each show the emcee will gather all of the contestants together for the dramatic voting off segment. That unfortante contestant will have an exit interview in which he or she tells why they should have not gotten kicked off although it would be fun if they said “take this job and shove it.” The last person standing will get the grand prize, a teaching contract good for one year.

Now that I have developed my show concept it is time to market it to network executives. That means doing presentations to the heads of CBS, NBC, ABC, Fox, USA, Turner, and (for good measure) GSN (aka The Gameshow Network). The thing scares me the most is that every network would pass on the project with the same response: “Reality shows are about real events. Nobody would ever believe what you propose is real.” There might be one network who would accept the show, Spike. They allow anyone to post videos to their website.

Update: Now that I have posted this idea, anyone who takes it and actually makes this and puts it on TV without my permission will get treated in the time-honored techno way, getting sued